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It's All In The Eyes

Updated: Aug 29, 2018

I came across this photo saved in my image album today and was immediately drawn ..

Back to the profound way I've always felt moved by what one sees in the eyes of others - the deep truth; the beauty of the soul; the sheer vulnerability & pure unguarded innocence!

I've had this experience from the youngest age. As a deeply empathic child, I could (and still do) literally FEEL the connection through the eyes. Boy, did James Cameron have it nailed with 'I See You'!

Having learned at the youngest age that the world didn't much seem to care for this kind of perceptiveness, considering it some kinda woo woo, I longed to get a better understanding of what I was intuiting in my own way, because there was nobody to ask who I felt had a clue what I was wanting to understand. To be honest, no way would I have had the vocabulary back then anyway to even know WHAT to ask. I just had this powerful sense that there was more to life than just the body we inhabit.

I felt that there was something inside - behind the eyes - that 'drove' the machine of my body. I wanted to know what it was. I wanted to 'see' as well as sense it. I can recall, as a teenager - one day, alone in the privacy of my bedroom (my cocoon: the place where I could hide away and read, learn, seek - well, there and the outdoors where I would often take myself out for solitary walks by the woods behind the houses on my street) getting hold of a suitable source of low light, which I situated shining up below a long wall mirror I had in my room.

I then brought my face into the light so that my eyes were softly illuminated but not much else. I tried softening my gaze and when this didn't reveal anything 'woo woo', I'd alternate to staring really hard, but that didn't work either.

As you could imagine, I eventually gave up, thinking that if 'spirit' wanted to be seen by my human eyes, it would have revealed itself to me.

I hadn't been all that sure what I was expecting to 'see' to be fair. Perhaps it was just a deep desire for a earthly 'visual' confirmation of some kind of this inner truth, but alas, I was able only to confirm to myself that the truth was behind my eyes - somewhere hidden away from my conscious attention.

The feeling of connection to something much deeper in the eyes has always persisted. I'm not convinced that it's all that unusual actually, but I'm fairly certain that most of us never really seek to understand the power of connection when one looks into the eyes of another.

A few years ago, I watched the horror story that is Earthlings (that for sure woke me up!) and I bawled my own eyes out all the way through. My younger son was in the house at the time and was mystified why I would want to put myself through that, knowing how sensitive I am to the suffering of others.

I felt compelled to witness the harsh reality for the animals of our planet because I want so much to help change things for them. The hardest point for me of all the hard points in the film was when the camera panned in on some kind of fox I think that had just been skinned alive. The confusion, the agony, the betrayal of its pure trust as it lay there dying in agony having just been stripped of it's skin so that someone else could prance about in it just crucified me. I will NEVER forget it. My eyes are filling up now just writing about it. It was the eyes - more than anything else - that conveyed the true nature of the cruelty just been inflicted on this poor innocent being.

As I've travelled through my life, so many times I can recall just how deep the connection has been when one looks into the eyes of a fellow inhabitant of earth. When the face is in repose, relaxed and unguarded, the eyes tell you everything.

Even when a face is sneering, rageful, full of hate, if one is safe enough to look long enough into the eyes, the underlying emotion - the humanity - is visible.

The connection between one's own eyes and the eyes of another, for me at least, is the most profound meeting of spirit one can experience while one exists within the confines (or perhaps even the perceived confines) of the physical body.

If we would only take the trouble to truly experience one another - not just our fellow humans, but also our fellow species, through the eyes this way, it's my true feeling that we could never willfully harm one another.

I believe that true brutality avoids the eye connection, unless, perhaps, one is a psychopath. It seems unsurprising to me that people being executed have their eyes covered! It's unsurprising that it seems easier for someone to inflict injustice, abuse or cruelty on another when they are looking away. Our truth is exposed through our eyes.

I wonder if that's why we can find it so hard to hold a gaze with another human being, and yet we (at least those of us who love animals) can so easily fill up with the most powerful love for our pets and other animals when they honour us with just the kind of steady gaze you see in the photo above.

We do it with ease too, with babies (and don't we just try so hard to get them to look into our eyes for this connection?), and with a new lover (look into his angel eyes, one look and you're hypnotised ..) whose eyes we seem so deeply compelled to gaze adoringly into in the beginning.

One has to wonder, what goes wrong? Why do we stop making this connection?

Interesting subject for exploration, perhaps?

My challenge to you today, and to myself actually, is to try to add a couple of extra seconds of holding soft and unguarded eye contact with everyone you meet today!

Have fun!

Please feel free to share your experiences below. I literally can't wait to read them!

With love,



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Aug 28, 2018

When doing training in tantra we were taught to eye gaze and I found it the hardest of the things to learn. Either I was in my head worrying about what they saw or I was lost in their journey of their emotions. Thank you for this reminder.

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